And,
The past two day here at Broadley Penitentiary have been interesting to say the least and with the onset of yet another snow event, I am feeling the extra work with having the Frolicking Frisky Fat girls amongst the prisoners. The Little Nasties have gone on strike and not laid their little duckie eggs for two days, the Little Chicken Mafia have been practicing their own brand of payback and Peckerhead…well he’s just being a peckerhead. Everyone in the cells are protesting the crowded conditions…
The Frolicking Frisky Fat girls are loving and fun and ohhhh so curious…nosing the other prisoners creating a flurry of quacks and squawks…outrage from the fluffy feathered fowl…they charge the door each time I enter, all sixty to seventy pounds of them trying to make a quick prison break…and I’ve been bribing them with Ritz crackers so that I can inspect their fat little bodies and become familiar with their goaty ways. This makes the others jealous…and they vocalize angrily when my pockets are empty of extra treats…
So, as payback the Little Chicken Mafia has decided that they will roost above the two fat girls and proceed to drop poop bombs on them throughout the night…leaving me in the morning to have to wrangle the fat little butterballs and give them each a sponge bath. One of the chickens, Gladys, has decided that the best way to get me back for introducing this chaos into her life is to start pecking at the eggs the other cell mates have laid…leaving me two mornings in a row without my breakfast.
And Peckerhead, well he is just downright piffed off! Twice on my forays into his territory this morning he squawked and growled, puffed up his feathers and made a run at my legs…which landed him in solitary for the rest of the day…no bread and water for that little bad boy.
As with any prison, introducing new cell mates leaves a bit of chaos in its wake…normally there are fights for positioning…who is the biggest, the baddest and the most ornery prisoner on the block. I’ve removed anything that can be remotely used as a prison weapon, shivs, sharp sticks, nails and paperclips….and my solitary confinement cell is ready and waiting for the little line of guests that may be assigned there for a temporary stay…the first of course which is Peckerhead.
I am hoping the Little Nasties will get used to the new guests and start laying eggs again for me and Gladys will stop trying to destroy the other hens eggs…and most of all, I hope the Little Chicken Mafia stops dropping poop bombs on top of the Frolicking, Frisky Fatgirls. And Peckerhead…well…I guess that bad boy of the barnyard now has some bigger and badder competition for king of the prison cell block…so we will see…tee hee…
Nancy is the Author of Rooted In Nature, Homesteader and Herbalist. A mother of two grown children and grand-mother to two beautiful girls. She is also Fur-mom to three girls, prison guard of the Little Chicken Mafia, The Bad boy of the Barnyard and Two Little Nasties (her ducks). She has a great sense of humor and she says that… “undertaking this lifestyle has brought out the best of me.” She lives in the hills of Washington, New Hampshire, a beautiful and serene setting for this simple lifestyle she has chosen.
"The doctor of the future will give no medicine, but will interest his patient in the care of the human frame, in diet and in the cause and prevention of disease" ~ Thomas Jefferson
